oh god it n3ta

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You should think of a myspace account as a funny tshirt slogan, and myspace as a pub, and the other people on it as coils of wire, pulsing slightly as they whisper the names of the dead.

You should think of a facebook account as your face, and facebook as a huge mincing machine, and the other people on it as a huge dead mass exerting their gravitional pull on you from just behind the mincing blades.

You should think of a twitter as a little plate with some kitchen roll spread out on it and dampened and each twitter account as a single spire of cress slowly rising out of it and each comment on it as some kind of cancerous growth on your stalk and your twitter feed is where your growths and some of your neighbours growths intertwine and draw you nearer even though the last thing you ever wanted to do was be near them or anyone else anywhere in the world, and especially not on this plate, on this window ledge by the back door.

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> The Quorn is approaching, the Quorn has arrived
mrak
post Jan 8 2015, 07:30 PM
Post #61


milm-cowl
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though tbh mum and dad separated in 1989 so perhaps it is the curse of Metroplex.


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dng
post Jan 8 2015, 11:10 PM
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Bloody Metroplex
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Bruce Sato
post Jan 10 2015, 12:55 PM
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Roadbuster was delivered to work yesterday, about 10 minutes after I left. Pissss. Now I have to decide whether I am well / bothered enough to go into work and fetch him. An additional complicating factor is that I am waiting for an Amazon delivery here, and I don't know when it's likely to show up, and these days they seem to love taking your parcel away instead of even trying to put it through letterbox. It is 1 DVD and 1 blauray, surely it must fit?


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Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
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vom
post Jan 10 2015, 01:49 PM
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Amazon are fucking hopeless since they started using their own courier service


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vom
post Jan 10 2015, 01:49 PM
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that said my flat is a bit difficult to find


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The Robotic Anom...
post Jan 10 2015, 01:56 PM
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You're telling me


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Bruce Sato
post Jan 10 2015, 02:13 PM
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Apparently the only thing Amazon can fit through a letterbox these days is a WE MISSED YOU card. Mr Amazon timed that exactly for when I was in the shower. Cunt.

Oh well, off to work to retrieve a Transformer. Hopefully.


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Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
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mrak
post Jan 10 2015, 02:42 PM
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Last year Amazoon delivered the rubbish Morrissey book to my work on a Sunday for some reason. I had a phone call from a man who I spoke to every day and it was clear that he had no idea who I was so I asked him to hide it in the fridge until Monday.


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mrak
post Jan 10 2015, 02:47 PM
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blimey, that was 2013. Time flies. apologies that Morrissey's rubbish book is not a Transformer though it probably mentions the Lou Reed album of the same name at some point. There's no index so I can't check.


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dng
post Jan 10 2015, 02:49 PM
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imagine morrisey transforming into a huge shapeless blob
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mrak
post Jan 10 2015, 03:26 PM
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Exicitng Transformers fact: as a child, I never ever saw Omega Supreme for sale in a toy shop or toy department (Redditch's only toy shop was a tiny branch of Zodiac) but there was an imported Japanese toy for sale in the corner shop near my school which was the original non-Transformers toy they licensed the design for Omega Supreme. I was ever so excited.

But my mum was paranoid about toys bought from unusual places because of Watchdog's LEAD PAINT FAKE TRANSFORMER/POPULAR-TOY-OF-THE-DAY CHILD POISONED stories so refused to buy it, which is also the reason she refused to get me the Constructicons boxset from Wellesbourne market despite it being a clear bargain at a tenner.


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Bruce Sato
post Jan 10 2015, 03:59 PM
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I remember that proto-Omega Supreme, he was on sale briefly at a shop in Dartford but I didn't get one. The Constructicons eventually showed up in Woolworths for about 6 months in 1989-90; I only managed to get four, which infuriated me. I have subsequently purchased both Omega Supreme and the Constructicon giftset when they were reissued. Devastator guards my Dr Who DVDs.

Well, I thought for a moment that that was a wasted trip as the postroom was locked, but a security guard unlocked it for me and I picked up Roadbuster. Photos to follow.


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Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
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John D
post Jan 10 2015, 04:19 PM
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I hope you told him what he was unlocking for
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Rodney Bewes
post Jan 10 2015, 04:51 PM
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QUOTE (mrak @ Jan 10 2015, 03:26 PM) *
But my mum was paranoid about toys bought from unusual places because of Watchdog's LEAD PAINT FAKE TRANSFORMER/POPULAR-TOY-OF-THE-DAY CHILD POISONED stories so refused to buy it


Bloody Lynn Faulds Wood. I remember her getting all bothered and horrified over some Goldilocks & The Three Bears themed-pens, one of which had a picture of Little Bear holding a bowl of porridge and looking at it and thinking, "How does Goldilocks eat this stuff?" and Mrs Faulds Wood naturally assumed would cause children to eat the pens. Because I was a complete idiot when I was a child, I completely agreed with this line of reasoning and when I told my dad about it he just laughed and laughed and laughed
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dng
post Jan 10 2015, 04:53 PM
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Excellnt
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mrak
post Jan 10 2015, 05:00 PM
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Hoho.

My favourite Watchdog scare was over these weird little plastic-looking robot toys that when immersed in water grew in size, turning into grey, meat-looking things in vaguely the same shape. WHAT HAPPENS IF A KIDDY SWALLOWS IT?!!!! THEIR STOMACH WIL EPXLOSE!


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mrak
post Jan 10 2015, 05:06 PM
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They still make them, it seems. The product description here is excellent.gif.


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dng
post Jan 10 2015, 05:13 PM
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I don't remember those at all. They sound fucking brilliant
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Rodney Bewes
post Jan 10 2015, 07:01 PM
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I remember there being a Gremlins version of those things, which was a pretty apt tie-in. A friend of mine described the process of how one he bought swelled up and he made it sound absolutely horrific, somehow.
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Bruce Sato
post Jan 13 2015, 01:57 PM
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Further Quorns were delivered today at work in a huge box. The box has been packed using Daily Richard pages. I will take photos (of the Transformers, not the Daily Hitler) this evening, dinner permitting.


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Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
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Bruce Sato
post Jan 13 2015, 02:07 PM
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By which I mean that I'm not entirely sure I'm going to survive tonight's dinner.


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Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
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dng
post Apr 4 2015, 07:53 PM
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QUOTE
Slag is the name of several fictional characters in the Transformers franchise. He is a Dinobot. In 2007, it was realized that "slag" is a swear word in the United Kingdom (as well as post-Beast Wars Transformers culture, though the real-life term is more of a sexual nature), which might have a negative effect on toy sales. In Transformers: Fall of Cybertron and Transformers: Age of Extinction, Slag is renamed Slug.
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dng
post Apr 4 2015, 07:53 PM
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also we're still waiting for those pictures bruce give us our pictures
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An Unicorn
post Apr 4 2015, 11:27 PM
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and then I go and spoil it all by saying something evil like "I bum crow"
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I didn't think slag was a full-on swear?


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However, it is not a commonly-held view that death is a negative interaction.
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dng
post Apr 4 2015, 11:28 PM
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Its not, its just a bit like (by which i mean essentially identical to) having a character called slut
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An Unicorn
post Apr 4 2015, 11:29 PM
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and then I go and spoil it all by saying something evil like "I bum crow"
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QUOTE (Bruce Sato @ Jan 13 2015, 10:07 AM) *
By which I mean that I'm not entirely sure I'm going to survive tonight's dinner.

Oh no bruce, did you have Schroedinger's Box for dinner


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An Unicorn
post Apr 4 2015, 11:29 PM
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and then I go and spoil it all by saying something evil like "I bum crow"
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Are there now infinite potential Bruces, in place of one actual Bruce?


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dng
post Apr 4 2015, 11:30 PM
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A bruce for every occasion
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dng
post Apr 4 2015, 11:30 PM
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There are four occasions
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Bruce Sato
post Apr 5 2015, 12:31 AM
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THERE! ARE! FOUR! BRUCES!
/
Picard


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Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
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