oh god it n3ta

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You should think of a myspace account as a funny tshirt slogan, and myspace as a pub, and the other people on it as coils of wire, pulsing slightly as they whisper the names of the dead.

You should think of a facebook account as your face, and facebook as a huge mincing machine, and the other people on it as a huge dead mass exerting their gravitional pull on you from just behind the mincing blades.

You should think of a twitter as a little plate with some kitchen roll spread out on it and dampened and each twitter account as a single spire of cress slowly rising out of it and each comment on it as some kind of cancerous growth on your stalk and your twitter feed is where your growths and some of your neighbours growths intertwine and draw you nearer even though the last thing you ever wanted to do was be near them or anyone else anywhere in the world, and especially not on this plate, on this window ledge by the back door.

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> Thrill-o-tennis thread, the Djokovic only loses when he's paid thread
Bruce Sato
post Jun 4 2008, 03:44 PM
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I can't find a tennis thread mother there should be a tennis thread.

Is anyone following the French Open? I am 'watching' it via the miracle of BBC live text. Federer is playing Speedy Gonzalez and lost the first set, but then went mad and took the next two sets like a loon. In other news, Marat Safin has had a sex change and is playing in the women's competition, and is doing pretty well.

Tennis.


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Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
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_david_
post Jun 4 2008, 04:01 PM
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i just watched federer. at one point he took his shirt off, and his hairy chest looked like it had been perfectly groomed. It was breathtaking
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John D
post Jun 4 2008, 04:55 PM
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i like tennis
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Bruce Sato
post Jun 4 2008, 04:57 PM
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It is best.
I don't much like the French Open, though, because of orange. And 500-hit rallies.


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Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
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david_h
post Jun 4 2008, 05:46 PM
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I've deliberately avoid the French Open to avoid getting hooked into it.

Clay court tennis is bets tennis.

Olso - their cameramen (and you know they're men) used to linger quite obviously on attractive ladies in the crowd. You could almost hear their lustful wheezing



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dng
post Jun 4 2008, 05:48 PM
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today they kept the camera on some massive ubbed lady for the full two minute break between sets
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dng
post Jun 4 2008, 05:48 PM
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joke about serena williams
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dng
post Jun 4 2008, 05:48 PM
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it wasn't serena williams it was someone else
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david_h
post Jun 4 2008, 05:57 PM
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I'm surprised the umpires don't smoke


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dng
post Jun 4 2008, 05:58 PM
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when they smooth the courts out between games they should have a man with a massive moustache driving a tractor doing it
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david_h
post Jun 4 2008, 05:59 PM
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racist!


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david_h
post Jun 4 2008, 06:00 PM
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i love wimbledon having no sponsor logos around the court (aside from rolex on the scoreboard)


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dng
post Jun 4 2008, 06:02 PM
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and slazenger at the back of the court and robinsons orange squash on the fridge
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Bruce Sato
post Jun 4 2008, 06:04 PM
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I love Wimbledon.

Worst instance of gawpage was in 1996 when Richard Krajicek won, because he was going out with some blonde scrag that the cameras found more interesting than any of the actual tennis. I didn't begrudge it when Philippoussis was playing and Delta Goodrem was in the crowd, because it inspired my sister to come out with "What's the use of her having cancer if it doesn't stop her singing?"


--------------------


Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
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david_h
post Jun 4 2008, 06:16 PM
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QUOTE(david_g @ Jun 4 2008, 07:02 PM) *
and slazenger at the back of the court and robinsons orange squash on the fridge


shut up those are traditional!


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david_h
post Jun 4 2008, 06:16 PM
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QUOTE(Bruce Sato @ Jun 4 2008, 07:04 PM) *
I love Wimbledon.

Worst instance of gawpage was in 1996 when Richard Krajicek won, because he was going out with some blonde scrag that the cameras found more interesting than any of the actual tennis. I didn't begrudge it when Philippoussis was playing and Delta Goodrem was in the crowd, because it inspired my sister to come out with "What's the use of her having cancer if it doesn't stop her singing?"


excellent!


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david_h
post Jun 4 2008, 06:18 PM
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mens tennis at wimbledon is unwatchable imo. Its all boom, bash and little artistry. Unless Federerererer's playing, o'course


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dng
post Jun 4 2008, 06:20 PM
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have you actually watched wimbledon since about 1999? there are hardly any players like that any more, due to all of them being dead
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david_h
post Jun 4 2008, 06:20 PM
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And the Henman/Murray circus gets on my nerves, also.



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david_h
post Jun 4 2008, 06:20 PM
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Especially when Henman rides that silly bike around the court that breaks into 6 pieces.


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dng
post Jun 4 2008, 06:21 PM
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it still hasn't made wimbledon that good, because they've just been replaced by a hundred timid argentinians moping around confused at the back of the court, hoping their opponent will know what to do
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david_h
post Jun 4 2008, 06:21 PM
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QUOTE(david_g @ Jun 4 2008, 07:20 PM) *
have you actually watched wimbledon since about 1999? there are hardly any players like that any more, due to all of them being dead


Ves, I watch it everyear David


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Bruce Sato
post Jun 4 2008, 06:21 PM
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Federer is a god among men. There's a shot of his up on the BBC tennis website that is staggering.

I always watched Henman for those occasional exquisite moments of touch tennis that is more or less a lost art nowadays. Only to scream as he dumped a stop-volley into the net. But he was more fun to watch than Andy Murray's lazy shitty drop-shots.

Bring back Edberg, I say.


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Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
Go to the top of the page
 
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dng
post Jun 4 2008, 06:22 PM
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Andy Murray is the worst player to watch in the world, due to the way he's a fucking irritating cunt who can't even really play tennis, so he just pretends he's injured instead, all the time
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david_h
post Jun 4 2008, 06:23 PM
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I want a shadow caddy

http://www.shadowcaddy.co.uk/en/video.cfm



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dng
post Jun 4 2008, 06:23 PM
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QUOTE(david_h @ Jun 4 2008, 07:21 PM) *
QUOTE(david_g @ Jun 4 2008, 07:20 PM) *
have you actually watched wimbledon since about 1999? there are hardly any players like that any more, due to all of them being dead


Ves, I watch it everyear David


then how come you have not noticed that, apart from roddick, all those boring rusedskis that used to foul everything up have been rounded up and shot, in the neck
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dng
post Jun 4 2008, 06:24 PM
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only to be replaced by an infinite number of murrays and nalbandians
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dng
post Jun 4 2008, 06:24 PM
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i have become needlessly agressive, for no real reason
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dng
post Jun 4 2008, 06:25 PM
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as needless agression always is
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Bruce Sato
post Jun 4 2008, 06:25 PM
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Also I am developing quite a dislike for Djokovic, because he's an arrogant tit who defaults on matches just to pretend that he didn't lose them (as in Monte Carlo vs. Federer, when Federer stuck it out against him at the Aus Open despite having bloody glandular fever).


--------------------


Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
Go to the top of the page
 
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