oh god it n3ta

Welcome Guest ( Log In | Register )

> Oi!

You should think of a myspace account as a funny tshirt slogan, and myspace as a pub, and the other people on it as coils of wire, pulsing slightly as they whisper the names of the dead.

You should think of a facebook account as your face, and facebook as a huge mincing machine, and the other people on it as a huge dead mass exerting their gravitional pull on you from just behind the mincing blades.

You should think of a twitter as a little plate with some kitchen roll spread out on it and dampened and each twitter account as a single spire of cress slowly rising out of it and each comment on it as some kind of cancerous growth on your stalk and your twitter feed is where your growths and some of your neighbours growths intertwine and draw you nearer even though the last thing you ever wanted to do was be near them or anyone else anywhere in the world, and especially not on this plate, on this window ledge by the back door.

98 Pages V  < 1 2 3 4 > »   
Reply to this topicStart new topic
> Thrill-o-tennis thread, the Djokovic only loses when he's paid thread
dng
post Jun 4 2008, 06:26 PM
Post #31


ascending
Group Icon


Posts: 133,995
Joined: 4-May 04
Member No.: 2



djokovic has stupid hair. also his angular body and irritating demeanor remind me of petr korda, and i hated petr korda, because he was a cunt
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
david_h
post Jun 4 2008, 06:29 PM
Post #32


Bocssssssssen
Group Icon


Posts: 53,829
Joined: 4-May 04
From: scumbo land
Member No.: 174



david, please think of the childre!


--------------------
there will be no more jokes
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
david_h
post Jun 4 2008, 06:30 PM
Post #33


Bocssssssssen
Group Icon


Posts: 53,829
Joined: 4-May 04
From: scumbo land
Member No.: 174



petr korda played one of the best shots i ever saw, a diving double backhand winner from the back of the court


--------------------
there will be no more jokes
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
Bruce Sato
post Jun 4 2008, 06:30 PM
Post #34


Doesn't Have a Smartphone
Group Icon


Posts: 13,219
Joined: 7-October 06
From: Boulder Hull, USA
Member No.: 176



Players I like(d) to watch: McEnroe (genius), Becker (scary German), Edberg (excellent volleys), Rafter (fun old-style tennis), Ivanisevic (due to mad), Agassi (exciting baseliner), Henman (could play wonderfully, for about twenty minutes), Federer, Federer, Federer

Players I like(d) not to watch: Sampras (suffocating playing style), Chang (YOU CAN'T CHASE EVERY FUCKING BALL YOU NUTTER), Courier (ugly), Lendl (booooring), Nalbandian (looks like he's dying), Hewitt (shut up, and get a haircut), Nadal (stop pulling pants out of arse)

I still haven't seen Fabrice Santoro play, but he's supposed to be excellently entertaining.


--------------------


Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
dng
post Jun 4 2008, 06:31 PM
Post #35


ascending
Group Icon


Posts: 133,995
Joined: 4-May 04
Member No.: 2



i like nadal, because i would like to have sex with him
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
dng
post Jun 4 2008, 06:31 PM
Post #36


ascending
Group Icon


Posts: 133,995
Joined: 4-May 04
Member No.: 2



i like that fat mad rubbish cypriot who bumbles about smiling best
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
Bruce Sato
post Jun 4 2008, 06:35 PM
Post #37


Doesn't Have a Smartphone
Group Icon


Posts: 13,219
Joined: 7-October 06
From: Boulder Hull, USA
Member No.: 176



It's a shame that Tsonga isn't likely to play at any more Grand Slams this year. I watched him during the Aus Open, and he was like some sort of super-powered wrestleman who'd been given a racquet and told to go nuts.


--------------------


Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
david_h
post Jun 4 2008, 06:35 PM
Post #38


Bocssssssssen
Group Icon


Posts: 53,829
Joined: 4-May 04
From: scumbo land
Member No.: 174



Henri Leconte was THE man


--------------------
there will be no more jokes
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
Bruce Sato
post Jun 4 2008, 06:37 PM
Post #39


Doesn't Have a Smartphone
Group Icon


Posts: 13,219
Joined: 7-October 06
From: Boulder Hull, USA
Member No.: 176



QUOTE(david_g @ Jun 4 2008, 07:26 PM) *
djokovic has stupid hair. also his angular body and irritating demeanor remind me of petr korda, and i hated petr korda, because he was a cunt


His family are a disgrace, too. Federer actually told them to be quiet during one match.

Obnoxious tennis parents usually have the grace to restrict themselves to female players, so I don't have to watch them.


--------------------


Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
John D
post Jun 5 2008, 07:52 AM
Post #40


bel-m
Group Icon


Posts: 28,127
Joined: 24-April 05
From: turd dimension
Member No.: 71



I like Jankovic, due to name. She's probably the only female player i like watching, as she at least has some personality. Her doubles win with Jamie Murray last year was excellent.

Also, Jamie Murray seems like a really nice, happy man. Unlike his stupid rubbish brother. I some other woman players as well, like Myskina and another Russian who I can't remember, or any woman tennis player with nice legs. I fucking hate Sharapova though. I want to punch her.

I also like Nadal, he is sexy.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
Bruce Sato
post Jun 5 2008, 05:40 PM
Post #41


Doesn't Have a Smartphone
Group Icon


Posts: 13,219
Joined: 7-October 06
From: Boulder Hull, USA
Member No.: 176



I 'watched' the semi-finals via the BBC updates this afternoon, while trying to find old and irritating instances of the verb 'use'. First one sounded good, second one looked like a bit of a shocker. I'm already missing Henin - she was the only woman player who had an ounce of strategy (not to mention a single-handed backhand).

Tentative tip: Safina to win it. Ivanovic has a huge head.


--------------------


Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
david_h
post Jun 5 2008, 06:32 PM
Post #42


Bocssssssssen
Group Icon


Posts: 53,829
Joined: 4-May 04
From: scumbo land
Member No.: 174



Henin's backhand was a lovely shot.


--------------------
there will be no more jokes
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
dng
post Jun 5 2008, 06:34 PM
Post #43


ascending
Group Icon


Posts: 133,995
Joined: 4-May 04
Member No.: 2



the best thing about henin was she looked like she would stab you outside the co op if you wouldn't give her a fag
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
david_h
post Jun 5 2008, 06:37 PM
Post #44


Bocssssssssen
Group Icon


Posts: 53,829
Joined: 4-May 04
From: scumbo land
Member No.: 174



and her life stroy was sooooooooooooooooo sad. you just wanted her to win so she'd have a least a brief moment of happiness


--------------------
there will be no more jokes
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
david_h
post Jun 5 2008, 06:38 PM
Post #45


Bocssssssssen
Group Icon


Posts: 53,829
Joined: 4-May 04
From: scumbo land
Member No.: 174



QUOTE(david_g @ Jun 5 2008, 07:34 PM) *
the best thing about henin was she looked like she would stab you outside the co op if you wouldn't give her a fag


ha ha ha!


--------------------
there will be no more jokes
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
John D
post Jun 5 2008, 07:56 PM
Post #46


bel-m
Group Icon


Posts: 28,127
Joined: 24-April 05
From: turd dimension
Member No.: 71



i always thought henin looked like darren anderton
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
Chortle Hound
post Jun 5 2008, 09:26 PM
Post #47


wakey
Group Icon


Posts: 18,030
Joined: 16-June 05
Member No.: 87



heniiiiiiin


--------------------
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
david_h
post Jun 5 2008, 09:44 PM
Post #48


Bocssssssssen
Group Icon


Posts: 53,829
Joined: 4-May 04
From: scumbo land
Member No.: 174



what sports do you like hughvuss?


--------------------
there will be no more jokes
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
dng
post Jun 5 2008, 09:45 PM
Post #49


ascending
Group Icon


Posts: 133,995
Joined: 4-May 04
Member No.: 2



talking about sports is like burping in public
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
david_h
post Jun 5 2008, 09:47 PM
Post #50


Bocssssssssen
Group Icon


Posts: 53,829
Joined: 4-May 04
From: scumbo land
Member No.: 174



isn't burping in denmark or somewhere forren, considered the height of manners?


--------------------
there will be no more jokes
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
david_h
post Jun 5 2008, 09:48 PM
Post #51


Bocssssssssen
Group Icon


Posts: 53,829
Joined: 4-May 04
From: scumbo land
Member No.: 174



I can burp at will - its my party piece


--------------------
there will be no more jokes
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
Bruce Sato
post Jun 5 2008, 10:37 PM
Post #52


Doesn't Have a Smartphone
Group Icon


Posts: 13,219
Joined: 7-October 06
From: Boulder Hull, USA
Member No.: 176



This is my most successful thread ever. It might even win an award.


--------------------


Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
dng
post Jun 5 2008, 10:46 PM
Post #53


ascending
Group Icon


Posts: 133,995
Joined: 4-May 04
Member No.: 2



homfrus's other party piece is unmentionable
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
Chortle Hound
post Jun 5 2008, 11:04 PM
Post #54


wakey
Group Icon


Posts: 18,030
Joined: 16-June 05
Member No.: 87



QUOTE(david_h @ Jun 5 2008, 10:44 PM) *
what sports do you like hughvuss?


I'll tell you a thing.

When I was a far, far younger Hound than the one you find astride you now, I was quite the sportsman.

I was better than average at most sports, I think due to my having a good sense of balance and a wiry but nimble physique.

I played cricket for my village up until I was 15 or so, and was a spectator at lots of International and County matches up and down the country during my teens. Apparently hopes were quite high for me to make a career out of cricket, but I don't remember feeling that way at all, and adolescence killed my affection for team sports.

I was on the Water Polo team in my 1st year at secondary school, and competed with the Witham Dolphins as a teenager. I am a qualified lifesaver and a very strong swimmer. My lungs are 11% larger than average (according to SCIENCE) - though smoking has probably dented that somewhat - and used to be able to easily hold my breath for 3 minutes or so underwater. I love being underwater.

Running used to be easy. I could run and run and run. I don't even run for the bus these days, I just wait for the next one.

I played Badminton at Sixth Form and Table Tennis at University. I also took Fencing lessons, but stopped after a few months as it was ran really poorly.

But I have never developed a taste for watching televised sports. Didn't inherit an appreciation for football from my father, or influence from my older brother. I have been known to have a rugby or football match 'on' in the background on occasion, but usually only if it is in the order of a World Cup final or something.

Talking about sport. I have no tolerance for sport talk. I go from placid to equal parts infuriated and bored stiff in less than a second.

In summary: Sport is excellent. I thoroughly approve of the notion. I just don't care for the specifics at all.


--------------------
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
Bruce Sato
post Jun 5 2008, 11:13 PM
Post #55


Doesn't Have a Smartphone
Group Icon


Posts: 13,219
Joined: 7-October 06
From: Boulder Hull, USA
Member No.: 176



Watching tennis is compulsory in my family. Playing sports is not. Though my dad played a lot of sport (fussball, rugby, crikkit, boxing, squish), before he got old.


--------------------


Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
Bruce Sato
post Jun 5 2008, 11:15 PM
Post #56


Doesn't Have a Smartphone
Group Icon


Posts: 13,219
Joined: 7-October 06
From: Boulder Hull, USA
Member No.: 176



I would have liked to play tennis, but there were no courts, and now I am old, fat.


--------------------


Anybody who comes into the n3ta forest will be lost.
Everybody will become a Homfrus.
Everybody, Homfrus.
So, he's not here anymore.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
An Unicorn
post Jun 6 2008, 03:11 AM
Post #57


and then I go and spoil it all by saying something evil like "I bum crow"
Group Icon


Posts: 7,678
Joined: 8-October 06
From: Amelicus
Member No.: 178



I was never interested in sports until last year. Now I am too old to play any of them ever (22).


--------------------
However, it is not a commonly-held view that death is a negative interaction.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
dng
post Jun 6 2008, 09:32 AM
Post #58


ascending
Group Icon


Posts: 133,995
Joined: 4-May 04
Member No.: 2



You should take up darts. You can play that until you explode (aged 53)
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
david_h
post Jun 6 2008, 09:35 AM
Post #59


Bocssssssssen
Group Icon


Posts: 53,829
Joined: 4-May 04
From: scumbo land
Member No.: 174



QUOTE(The Chortle Hound @ Jun 6 2008, 12:04 AM) *
QUOTE(david_h @ Jun 5 2008, 10:44 PM) *
what sports do you like hughvuss?


I played cricket for my village up until I was 15 or so, and was a spectator at lots of International and County matches up and down the country during my teens. Apparently hopes were quite high for me to make a career out of cricket, but I don't remember feeling that way at all, and adolescence killed my affection for team sports.



:impressed:

the hound appears to be some sort of viking daley thompson!


--------------------
there will be no more jokes
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
david_h
post Jun 6 2008, 09:35 AM
Post #60


Bocssssssssen
Group Icon


Posts: 53,829
Joined: 4-May 04
From: scumbo land
Member No.: 174



QUOTE(david_g @ Jun 6 2008, 10:32 AM) *
You should take up darts. You can play that until you explode (aged 53)


shhhhhhhhhhh, don't tell him when he pops!


--------------------
there will be no more jokes
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post

98 Pages V  < 1 2 3 4 > » 
Reply to this topicStart new topic

 



Lo-Fi Version Time is now: 16th January 2018 - 09:24 PM