Tales From The Town #116: In The Pale Moonlight
The cat was on the trampoline again, leaping, bouncing, wailing, crying. It was impossible to tell if it was having fun or not, and even if anyone had been awake, no one would have dared come down to see.
A Cast Of Characters
Re: A Cast Of Characters
Tales From The Town 117: The Very Nice Tales Of The Very Nice Children Who Live In Very Nice Houses In A Very Nice Town Somewhere Far Far Away
“What are watching, Tina?” Claire asked, snatching Tina’s phone out of her hand to have a look.
“Nothing,” Tuna said, snatching it back to try and stop Claire having a look.
“Well it looks like something!” Claire said, as the phone snatching loop slowly reached equilibrium and it was finally held uneasily exactly midway between both of them. “Wait, what ARE you watching?”
“Nothing,” Tina said. “You wouldn’t like it anyway.”
“I might,” Claire said. “Who’s that?”
“That’s the nice girl,” Tina said. “She’s the main character.”
“And who’s that?”
“That’s the nice boy,” Tina told her. “They’re neighbours.”
“And what’s that?!”
“That’s the nice dog who lives down the lane,” Tina said.
“How stupid,” Claire said. “Who’s ever heard of a nice dog?”
“I have,” Daniel said, much to the cat’s consternation.
“Shut up, Daniel,” Claire said.
“Mum likes dogs too,” Ethel said.
“Only the bad ones,” Claire said. Then she looked back at the phone. “So what are they doing now?”
“They’re having a poetry competition.”
“I thought you hated poetry competitions,” Claire said.
“I do,” Tina said. “And so do they. They’re only in it because their very nice and well-meaning but actually slightly naive teacher hoped it might bring them out of their shells.”
“They don’t even have shells,” Claire said.
“Unlike Claire,” said Daniel, much to the cat’s amusement.
“Shut up, Daniel,” Claire said. “So, wait, are those their poems?” She pointed to the text at the bottom of the screen and read it out slowly and loudly.
“‘Artistic endeavour is not a competitive pursuit.'”
“See?” Tina said. “That’s exactly what I think too. They’re so nice!”
“So stupid, more like,” Claire said. “What sort of poem is that?”
“They’re not poems, Claire. they’re subtitles,” Tina said, as on screen the nice boy told the nice girl that his poems were so personal not even he was allowed to read them and he’d written them, himself, all on his own.
“Why have you got subtitles on?” Claire said. “It’s TV not Read Me!”
“Mine are so personal I only ever wrote them in dust,” the nice girl said. “So that the wind can blow them away as soon as they’re done.”
“Because you won’t shut up and let her hear what they’re saying, Claire,” Ethel said.
“Don’t you tell me to shut up, Ethel!” Claire said. “You shut up!”
“No you!”
“Maybe you could both shut up,” Tina suggested.
“NO!”
****
“Hey everyone!” Agnes said, as she came in through the front door and popped her head round the corner to say hi. “You all having fun in here?”
“Mum, you won’t believe what Tina’s making us watch in here,” Claire said. “It’s total rubbish!”
“It’s not,” Tina said. “It’s nice.”
“Yeah! Nice and boring!” Claire said. “Honestly, Mum, it’s even worse than Blue Peter!”
“I like Blue Peter,” Daniel said, much to the cat’s complete disbelief. “They make things out of toilet rolls.”
“You’re made out of toilet rolls,” Claire said, as Tina sighed loudly. “Yeah, and so are you, Tina!”
Tina shook her head and slowly faded out of existence and disappeared sadly back to her room. Her phone hovered in the air for a second, before falling to the ground, much to the cat’s sudden startlement.
“What are watching, Tina?” Claire asked, snatching Tina’s phone out of her hand to have a look.
“Nothing,” Tuna said, snatching it back to try and stop Claire having a look.
“Well it looks like something!” Claire said, as the phone snatching loop slowly reached equilibrium and it was finally held uneasily exactly midway between both of them. “Wait, what ARE you watching?”
“Nothing,” Tina said. “You wouldn’t like it anyway.”
“I might,” Claire said. “Who’s that?”
“That’s the nice girl,” Tina said. “She’s the main character.”
“And who’s that?”
“That’s the nice boy,” Tina told her. “They’re neighbours.”
“And what’s that?!”
“That’s the nice dog who lives down the lane,” Tina said.
“How stupid,” Claire said. “Who’s ever heard of a nice dog?”
“I have,” Daniel said, much to the cat’s consternation.
“Shut up, Daniel,” Claire said.
“Mum likes dogs too,” Ethel said.
“Only the bad ones,” Claire said. Then she looked back at the phone. “So what are they doing now?”
“They’re having a poetry competition.”
“I thought you hated poetry competitions,” Claire said.
“I do,” Tina said. “And so do they. They’re only in it because their very nice and well-meaning but actually slightly naive teacher hoped it might bring them out of their shells.”
“They don’t even have shells,” Claire said.
“Unlike Claire,” said Daniel, much to the cat’s amusement.
“Shut up, Daniel,” Claire said. “So, wait, are those their poems?” She pointed to the text at the bottom of the screen and read it out slowly and loudly.
“‘Artistic endeavour is not a competitive pursuit.'”
“See?” Tina said. “That’s exactly what I think too. They’re so nice!”
“So stupid, more like,” Claire said. “What sort of poem is that?”
“They’re not poems, Claire. they’re subtitles,” Tina said, as on screen the nice boy told the nice girl that his poems were so personal not even he was allowed to read them and he’d written them, himself, all on his own.
“Why have you got subtitles on?” Claire said. “It’s TV not Read Me!”
“Mine are so personal I only ever wrote them in dust,” the nice girl said. “So that the wind can blow them away as soon as they’re done.”
“Because you won’t shut up and let her hear what they’re saying, Claire,” Ethel said.
“Don’t you tell me to shut up, Ethel!” Claire said. “You shut up!”
“No you!”
“Maybe you could both shut up,” Tina suggested.
“NO!”
****
“Hey everyone!” Agnes said, as she came in through the front door and popped her head round the corner to say hi. “You all having fun in here?”
“Mum, you won’t believe what Tina’s making us watch in here,” Claire said. “It’s total rubbish!”
“It’s not,” Tina said. “It’s nice.”
“Yeah! Nice and boring!” Claire said. “Honestly, Mum, it’s even worse than Blue Peter!”
“I like Blue Peter,” Daniel said, much to the cat’s complete disbelief. “They make things out of toilet rolls.”
“You’re made out of toilet rolls,” Claire said, as Tina sighed loudly. “Yeah, and so are you, Tina!”
Tina shook her head and slowly faded out of existence and disappeared sadly back to her room. Her phone hovered in the air for a second, before falling to the ground, much to the cat’s sudden startlement.
Re: A Cast Of Characters
and that's the next two months worth of that, or so
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pictures maybe coming at a later date
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Much goodness on show, David. Tales 111, 112, 113, and 117 are my particular faves.
Lovely stuff and pichers would be a bonus!
Lovely stuff and pichers would be a bonus!
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hooray. cheers
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Tales From The Town #118: Ted’s Shed
In Ted’s collection of Ted’s things in Ted’s shoeboxes in Ted’s shed in Ted’s Mum’s garden there currently resided:
1. Spider (large)
2. Spiders (small)
3. Cockroach collection
4. Mouse (dead) + maggots (not dead)
5. Slow worm
6. Fast worm
7. More worms (various speeds)
8. [Escaped]
9. Stick insect
10. Stick that looks like an insect
11. Cocoon (unknown inhabitant)
12. Wasps’ nest (empty)
13. Bee hive (full)
14. Ant colony (writhing)
15. Cat (asleep)
16. Rock that looks like a fossil but probably isn’t a fossil
17. Rock that doesn’t look like a fossil but actually is a fossil
18. Assorted skulls
19. Assorted bones
20. Snails
21. Slugs
22. Slugs AND snails
23. Venus fly traps (plus slugs)
24. Shoes (plus snails)
25. Feathers (unsorted)
26. Eggs (dozen)
27. Discarded Selenite shell
28. Doll (awake)
29. Rusted toy car collection (plus a space shuttle)
30. Toenails/teeth (own)
31-50. [Awaiting exhibits]
In Ted’s collection of Ted’s things in Ted’s shoeboxes in Ted’s shed in Ted’s Mum’s garden there currently resided:
1. Spider (large)
2. Spiders (small)
3. Cockroach collection
4. Mouse (dead) + maggots (not dead)
5. Slow worm
6. Fast worm
7. More worms (various speeds)
8. [Escaped]
9. Stick insect
10. Stick that looks like an insect
11. Cocoon (unknown inhabitant)
12. Wasps’ nest (empty)
13. Bee hive (full)
14. Ant colony (writhing)
15. Cat (asleep)
16. Rock that looks like a fossil but probably isn’t a fossil
17. Rock that doesn’t look like a fossil but actually is a fossil
18. Assorted skulls
19. Assorted bones
20. Snails
21. Slugs
22. Slugs AND snails
23. Venus fly traps (plus slugs)
24. Shoes (plus snails)
25. Feathers (unsorted)
26. Eggs (dozen)
27. Discarded Selenite shell
28. Doll (awake)
29. Rusted toy car collection (plus a space shuttle)
30. Toenails/teeth (own)
31-50. [Awaiting exhibits]
Re: A Cast Of Characters
(ted previously: https://accumulationofthings.com/things ... 1-2-and-3/ )
Re: A Cast Of Characters
Tales From The Town #119: A Scene From Any Summer
The tennis courts were empty. The gates were shut, locked, padlocked, chained, bolted, and, quite possibly, even welded. No one had set foot inside since 1985 and no one would set foot inside again until 2055 at the very earliest unless something catastrophic happened and even then it was unlikely to be catastrophic enough to change anything that drastically.
The nets fluttered in the wind, as close a thing to genuine ghosts as anything in material existence could ever hope to be.
The tennis courts were empty. The gates were shut, locked, padlocked, chained, bolted, and, quite possibly, even welded. No one had set foot inside since 1985 and no one would set foot inside again until 2055 at the very earliest unless something catastrophic happened and even then it was unlikely to be catastrophic enough to change anything that drastically.
The nets fluttered in the wind, as close a thing to genuine ghosts as anything in material existence could ever hope to be.
Re: A Cast Of Characters
Tales From The Town #120: Ice Cream Competition
“Two scoops?!” Tina said, wide eyed with awe. “I’ve never had two scoops before.”
“Mine’s got two scoops too,” said Daniel. “In different flavours!”
“Mine has two scoops and a flake!” said Ethel. “I don’t know what’s gotten into dad but I like it.”
“I think maybe he’s just sad,” said Tina. “He’s not been the same since the mermaid ran off with that walrus last year.”
There was a moment of silence as they contemplated their father, as he counted out his sand and seaweed covered coins at the ice cream counter.
“Yeah, well mine has THREE scoops!” Claire shouted, quickly getting back to what was important.“And I’ve got two of them!" She pulled her arm out from behind her back with a flourish a magician would have been proud of. "You’ll never beat that!”
“Two scoops?!” Tina said, wide eyed with awe. “I’ve never had two scoops before.”
“Mine’s got two scoops too,” said Daniel. “In different flavours!”
“Mine has two scoops and a flake!” said Ethel. “I don’t know what’s gotten into dad but I like it.”
“I think maybe he’s just sad,” said Tina. “He’s not been the same since the mermaid ran off with that walrus last year.”
There was a moment of silence as they contemplated their father, as he counted out his sand and seaweed covered coins at the ice cream counter.
“Yeah, well mine has THREE scoops!” Claire shouted, quickly getting back to what was important.“And I’ve got two of them!" She pulled her arm out from behind her back with a flourish a magician would have been proud of. "You’ll never beat that!”
Re: A Cast Of Characters
You do an amusing list, Davuss! Hurrah!
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And a hearty thumbs up for TFTF #119 & #120, too!
Re: A Cast Of Characters
excellent, cheers
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Tales From The Town #121: Eclipse
The rules of the eclipse were you could only look at the sun when there was no more sun left to see. And even then you still had to wear glasses.
It wasn’t any fun at all.
The rules of the eclipse were you could only look at the sun when there was no more sun left to see. And even then you still had to wear glasses.
It wasn’t any fun at all.
Re: A Cast Of Characters
Tales From The Town #122: Sales
The salesman wanders from door to door, an endless collection of wonders kept in the back of his car. A magician taking his art to the people, one household at a time. He knows what we want better than we know ourselves.
Doorbell pressed. Smile engaged. Anticipation building within him like electricity coursing through a Tesla coil.
There is no escaping your own desire.
The salesman wanders from door to door, an endless collection of wonders kept in the back of his car. A magician taking his art to the people, one household at a time. He knows what we want better than we know ourselves.
Doorbell pressed. Smile engaged. Anticipation building within him like electricity coursing through a Tesla coil.
There is no escaping your own desire.
Re: A Cast Of Characters
Tales From The Town #123: The End Of Ignorance, or Technological Solutions To Previously Insoluble Problems
“AI is amazing,” Antione told the gathered audience of potential technological enthusiasts. “It can do anything! It knows everything! Never again shall we have to think and wonder when we can simply ask and know!”
There was a moment of awed silence that went on for quite a bit longer than Antione was expecting.
“So, c’mon kids, you must have something you want to ask it?”
“Dad, we’re playing with the campfire,” Claire said, as her and Daniel poked it with sticks and sent great clouds of smoke billowing through the cave. “We don’t have time to talk to a creepy dead doll with a phone in its skull.”
“It’s not creepy,” Antoine said. “I thought you liked dolls.”
“Wait, that doll’s yours?” Tina said. “I thought it was something Claire had stolen from the witch’s house.”
“I don’t steal things,” Claire said. “I take them.”
“That’s the same thing,” Ethel said.
“You’re the same thing,” Claire said.
“Maybe,” Antoine said, trying to return the topic of conversation back to its original path. “We could ask the AI whether stealing and taking are the same thing.”
“Couldn’t you just ask us, Dad?” Tina said. “Because we all know the answer to that. Even Claire knows. She just pretends she doesn’t.”
“I don’t pretend anything,” Claire said. “I just DO!”
“That doesn’t make any sense,” Ethel said.
“You don’t make any sense,” Claire said.
“Maybe we could just ask the…”
“Shut up, Dad!”
“Claire! Don’t you dare tell dad to shut up!”
“I can tell who I want to shut up!”
“No you can’t!”
“CAN!”
“CAN’T!”
“Daniel,” Antoine said quietly. “I bet you’ve got question or two about things, right?”
“In the mouth of the cavern a dragon sleeps,” Daniel said, throwing a pinecone onto the fire to make it belch flames and smoke out again. “And in the dragon’s mouth there’s a cavern you can sleep in.” Daniel looked up from the flames and stared through the smoke at Antoine. “So how do we know if we’re the dragon in the cave or the cave in the dragon?”
Antoine looked back through the smoke at Daniel.
“That question was for the doll,” Daniel added.
“Oh right,” Antoine said, slightly relieved, “Er, did you hear that, little dollAI? Are we the dragon in the cave or the cave in the dragon?”
The doll did not respond.
“AI is amazing,” Antione told the gathered audience of potential technological enthusiasts. “It can do anything! It knows everything! Never again shall we have to think and wonder when we can simply ask and know!”
There was a moment of awed silence that went on for quite a bit longer than Antione was expecting.
“So, c’mon kids, you must have something you want to ask it?”
“Dad, we’re playing with the campfire,” Claire said, as her and Daniel poked it with sticks and sent great clouds of smoke billowing through the cave. “We don’t have time to talk to a creepy dead doll with a phone in its skull.”
“It’s not creepy,” Antoine said. “I thought you liked dolls.”
“Wait, that doll’s yours?” Tina said. “I thought it was something Claire had stolen from the witch’s house.”
“I don’t steal things,” Claire said. “I take them.”
“That’s the same thing,” Ethel said.
“You’re the same thing,” Claire said.
“Maybe,” Antoine said, trying to return the topic of conversation back to its original path. “We could ask the AI whether stealing and taking are the same thing.”
“Couldn’t you just ask us, Dad?” Tina said. “Because we all know the answer to that. Even Claire knows. She just pretends she doesn’t.”
“I don’t pretend anything,” Claire said. “I just DO!”
“That doesn’t make any sense,” Ethel said.
“You don’t make any sense,” Claire said.
“Maybe we could just ask the…”
“Shut up, Dad!”
“Claire! Don’t you dare tell dad to shut up!”
“I can tell who I want to shut up!”
“No you can’t!”
“CAN!”
“CAN’T!”
“Daniel,” Antoine said quietly. “I bet you’ve got question or two about things, right?”
“In the mouth of the cavern a dragon sleeps,” Daniel said, throwing a pinecone onto the fire to make it belch flames and smoke out again. “And in the dragon’s mouth there’s a cavern you can sleep in.” Daniel looked up from the flames and stared through the smoke at Antoine. “So how do we know if we’re the dragon in the cave or the cave in the dragon?”
Antoine looked back through the smoke at Daniel.
“That question was for the doll,” Daniel added.
“Oh right,” Antoine said, slightly relieved, “Er, did you hear that, little dollAI? Are we the dragon in the cave or the cave in the dragon?”
The doll did not respond.
Re: A Cast Of Characters
Tales From The Town #124: Jellyfish
Have you ever wondered what a jellyfish thinks? Because a jellyfish hasn’t
Have you ever wondered what a jellyfish thinks? Because a jellyfish hasn’t
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best tale ever
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Tales From The Town #125: A Reading (or, Resilience Training)
“The sun shone sleekly through a silver sky,” Tina said, as she stood steadily on the stage (a chair).
“Booooooo!” Claire shouted out from the back of the room. “BOOOOOOOOOOO!”
“The moon mellowed meekly above a murmuring meadow,” Tina muttered, immovably.
“Awful,” Ethel heckled. “Just awful! You’re awful, Tina! You should be ashamed!”
“The rocket reflected repetitively as it rotated around the revolving rarity,” Tina roared, resolutely resilient to the rising reproval from the rowdy rabble.
“Rarity is another word for anomaly,” she added belatedly when there was silence from below.
“Best poem ever,” Daniel swooned. He clapped enthusiastically and then continued clapping enthusiastically for quite some time. “I love it! More! More!”
Tina ran crying from the stage.
“The sun shone sleekly through a silver sky,” Tina said, as she stood steadily on the stage (a chair).
“Booooooo!” Claire shouted out from the back of the room. “BOOOOOOOOOOO!”
“The moon mellowed meekly above a murmuring meadow,” Tina muttered, immovably.
“Awful,” Ethel heckled. “Just awful! You’re awful, Tina! You should be ashamed!”
“The rocket reflected repetitively as it rotated around the revolving rarity,” Tina roared, resolutely resilient to the rising reproval from the rowdy rabble.
“Rarity is another word for anomaly,” she added belatedly when there was silence from below.
“Best poem ever,” Daniel swooned. He clapped enthusiastically and then continued clapping enthusiastically for quite some time. “I love it! More! More!”
Tina ran crying from the stage.
Re: A Cast Of Characters
These are grand, with Tales #122 and #123 as ma faves. Yo!
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I remember watching that befo' - he does a fine job there!dng wrote: ↑Tue Jul 04, 2023 2:34 pm in related news: https://accumulationofthings.com/things ... e-anxiety/
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I could only perform if I was wearing a bear costume or similar.
ON STAGE OR BETWEEN THE SHEETS!!!!11!!
ON STAGE OR BETWEEN THE SHEETS!!!!11!!
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also t hank you homfrus
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Tales From The Town #126: The Circus (An Ethel A To Z)
A Day Out – The others said it was cheating to use this for A but I don’t care what they say.
Big Wheel – It went round and around until we got on and then it stopped. Everyone blamed Claire except Claire, who blamed everyone except Claire.
Candy Floss – Mum said we wouldn’t like this and she was right!
Dagger Throwing – We are NEVER allowed to do this at home.
Eggs (Pickled) – “It’s not a picnic without pickled eggs” says Mum (and no one else).
Fortune Teller – Apparently Tina’s going to get married! To a boy!
Gargantuan – What an amazing word. “The circus was gargantuan!”
Horror (House Of) – Daniel had a nose bleed in here.
Idiots (AKA Clowns) – They grow their faces in jars. Maybe they should keep them there.
Jugglers – Mum hates jugglers but will never tell us why. She wouldn’t let them teach us anything. We weren’t even allowed to watch.
King – Tina said he wasn’t the real King but then why was he wearing a crown?
Lady Luck – She told us we’d win but we didn’t win a thing (except for Daniel but he was cheating). Never trust Lady Luck!
Mirrors (Hall Of) – This made Claire absolutely furious!
Night – It was day when we went in, but night when we came out. I said this was magical and Mum agreed but then Claire said it was just the passing of time and she stamped in a puddle to prove it. (I still thought it was magical!)
Oracle – Apparently Tina’s going to get married! To a different boy!
Pennies – I found four and Tina found three but Claire and Daniel found EIGHT! But then I found a pound so who won really? (Claire and Daniel did it was a draw).
Queen – Tina said she wasn’t the real Queen but then why was she drinking all that tea?
Robots – Supposedly these aren’t “traditional”. But they were the best bit!
Selkie – Basically a mermaid. It’s a good thing Dad wasn’t here or he’d have gone all weird again.
Taffy – Mum said we wouldn’t like this and she was wrong!
Unicyclists – (see Jugglers)
Vampire – Mum said he wasn’t a vampire he was the ringmaster but he was definitely a vampire you could tell it was obvious.
Water – £5
Xtremely Unfunny – We didn’t laugh once (not even Daniel).
Y – Good question!
Zebras – There were some horses and that was as close as we ever got to a Z.
A Day Out – The others said it was cheating to use this for A but I don’t care what they say.
Big Wheel – It went round and around until we got on and then it stopped. Everyone blamed Claire except Claire, who blamed everyone except Claire.
Candy Floss – Mum said we wouldn’t like this and she was right!
Dagger Throwing – We are NEVER allowed to do this at home.
Eggs (Pickled) – “It’s not a picnic without pickled eggs” says Mum (and no one else).
Fortune Teller – Apparently Tina’s going to get married! To a boy!
Gargantuan – What an amazing word. “The circus was gargantuan!”
Horror (House Of) – Daniel had a nose bleed in here.
Idiots (AKA Clowns) – They grow their faces in jars. Maybe they should keep them there.
Jugglers – Mum hates jugglers but will never tell us why. She wouldn’t let them teach us anything. We weren’t even allowed to watch.
King – Tina said he wasn’t the real King but then why was he wearing a crown?
Lady Luck – She told us we’d win but we didn’t win a thing (except for Daniel but he was cheating). Never trust Lady Luck!
Mirrors (Hall Of) – This made Claire absolutely furious!
Night – It was day when we went in, but night when we came out. I said this was magical and Mum agreed but then Claire said it was just the passing of time and she stamped in a puddle to prove it. (I still thought it was magical!)
Oracle – Apparently Tina’s going to get married! To a different boy!
Pennies – I found four and Tina found three but Claire and Daniel found EIGHT! But then I found a pound so who won really? (Claire and Daniel did it was a draw).
Queen – Tina said she wasn’t the real Queen but then why was she drinking all that tea?
Robots – Supposedly these aren’t “traditional”. But they were the best bit!
Selkie – Basically a mermaid. It’s a good thing Dad wasn’t here or he’d have gone all weird again.
Taffy – Mum said we wouldn’t like this and she was wrong!
Unicyclists – (see Jugglers)
Vampire – Mum said he wasn’t a vampire he was the ringmaster but he was definitely a vampire you could tell it was obvious.
Water – £5
Xtremely Unfunny – We didn’t laugh once (not even Daniel).
Y – Good question!
Zebras – There were some horses and that was as close as we ever got to a Z.
Re: A Cast Of Characters
Tales From The Town #127: Projection
It was the greatest story ever told. Love, death, heroism, villainy, selflessness, satisfaction. Even a joke now and then, and some dancing too. Everything was up there on the screen, depths and layers you could stare into and see whatever it was you wanted to, needed to, hoped to, dared to, like a magic mirror, or a wishing pool, or an old album full of photos redolent of things greater than were ever really true at the time.
The projector caught fire half an hour in and no one ever saw the end.
It was the greatest story ever told. Love, death, heroism, villainy, selflessness, satisfaction. Even a joke now and then, and some dancing too. Everything was up there on the screen, depths and layers you could stare into and see whatever it was you wanted to, needed to, hoped to, dared to, like a magic mirror, or a wishing pool, or an old album full of photos redolent of things greater than were ever really true at the time.
The projector caught fire half an hour in and no one ever saw the end.
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Tales From The Town #128: The Diving Pool Incident
Frozen in place at the end of the board, too scared to jump, too embarrassed to turn back.
In years to come it would feel like this moment encompassed two thirds of Tina's childhood rather than approximately forty five seconds of one Saturday afternoon when she was eight.
Frozen in place at the end of the board, too scared to jump, too embarrassed to turn back.
In years to come it would feel like this moment encompassed two thirds of Tina's childhood rather than approximately forty five seconds of one Saturday afternoon when she was eight.
Re: A Cast Of Characters
Ethel's A To Z is most pleasing and should be taught in schools! *thumbs up*
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We've all had a #128 Incident, haven't we? *winces* Moi loikes, and #127, an' all.
"or an old album full of photos redolent of things greater than were ever really true at the time."
Best words!
"or an old album full of photos redolent of things greater than were ever really true at the time."
Best words!
Re: A Cast Of Characters
Thank ye, homfrus
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Tales From The Town #129-#135 (early autumn preview thread)
(to be published between September 30th and November 11th, 2023)
Tales From The Town #129: And the apples are all dead at the bottom of their trees
Apples rotting beneath the trees. Teardrop jewelled spider’s webs on the washing line. And in the distance ships lost in the fog out at sea.
Autumn was here, and not even Claire declaring that there’s no such thing as ghost ships could spoil Agnes’s mood.
Tales From The Town #130: The Rudest Word In The Entire World (Part 1)
“This game is rubbish!” Claire said, kicking the board up in the air and scattering toy cars everywhere. “It’s complete CRAP!”
“Claire!” Tina and Ethel exclaimed. “You can’t say that!”
“I can!” Claire said. “And I did!”
“But it’s…. it’s rude!”
“Really rude!”
“I don’t care!” Claire said. “And you shouldn’t either!”
“But we do!”
“What if Daniel hears!”
“You know how upset he gets about rude words!”
“And rude people!”
“And rudeness in general.”
“Well, maybe Daniel should just shut up!” Claire said.
Daniel came running into the room, arms outstretched, pretending to be an aeroplane. Then he flew back out of the room and up the stairs to play with the dolls, who didn’t swear at all, not even when talking about the witch.
Tales From The Town #131: Descriptions Of The Witch
The witch was
the witch
was
the witch
was the witch
Tales From The Town #132: The Rudest Word In The Entire World (Part 2)
“Mum! Claire keeps saying rude words!” Ethel said.
“I don’t!” Claire said.
“You do!” Tina said.
“Well, yes, I do! But I don’t care!” Claire said. “All I said was that Tina’s stupid car game was a load of old crap.”
“Claire you shouldn’t say things like that,” Agnes said. “You know Tina likes that car game.”
“Actually, it is kind of rubbish,” Tina said.
“We don’t even know what we’re doing most of the time,” Ethel said.
“Oh,” Agnes said. “So why are you upset with Claire then.”
“Cause she said…” Tina said. “She said that rude word Mum!”
“Daniel might have heard!” Ethel said.
“I was an aeroplane,” Daniel said. “And then I was the dolls’ best friend.” He looked at the cat to make sure she wasn’t jealous. “And then I was a spaceship.”
“See?” Claire said. “Spaceship’s don’t get upset by rude words.”
“Not even intelligent spaceships,” Daniel said, nodding sagely.
“Well, I’m glad this has all been sorted out,” Agnes said. “Also I didn’t even realise crap was a rude word.”
“Mum!” Tina and Ethel gasped, utterly shocked, as Daniel ran from the room screaming.
Tales From The Town #133: Eleonora’s Office Lunch
Bread (that was once fresh)
Spread (that contains the memory of butter and/or olive oil)
Apple (taken from beneath someone else’s tree)
Prepare before work
then at lunch eat as quickly as you can.
Try not to think
about anything at all
Tales From The Town #134: The Rudest Word In The Entire World (Part 3)
“So what is a rude word then, Mum?” Ethel asked.
“Yeah, Mum, I bet you know loads of rude words,” Claire said. “Like, you must know words so rude Daniel wouldn’t even know they were rude.”
“I’d know,” Daniel said, hugging the cat and one of the dolls while watching his favourite tv programme on his phone and eating a yoghurt all at once while also hiding in a den he’d made using a crocheted blanket stretched out between three chairs and kept in place by some precarious towers of heavy looking books.
“Well, maybe you just need to shut up, Daniel,” Claire said. “Maybe you should all shut up and let Mum say what she wants.”
“That doesn’t make any sense, Claire,” Tina said.
“I don’t care,” Claire said. “Anyway, look, Daniel’s put his headphones on. You can say anything now Mum!”
“Just so we know never to say whatever it is!” Ethel added, actually quite eager to hear something so forbidden.
“Or accidentally put it in a poem,” Tina said.
“Or a story.”
“Or the script we’re writing for a radio show that we’re going to broadcast to the whole town!”
“You’re not going to catch me out that easily,” Agnes said. “And anyway, it’s not the word that matters, it’s the intent.”
“That sounds stupid,” Claire said. “Of course it’s the word that matters, Mum. Otherwise it’d just be… noise!”
“I simply mean…” Agnes said, feeling quite defensive. She hated being put on the spot like this. “Like, what about the mayor?”
“What about the mayor?” Tina, Ethel and Claire all asked.
“I mean, the mayor,” Agnes said, looking out of the window as if maybe she could see the mayor out of the window even though the mayor was shut up in the mayor’s office like always and not in their garden like he never was and never had been nor ever would be. “There’s nothing wrong with the word. But what about the man?”
“What about the man?” Tina, Claire and Ethel all asked.
“Doesn’t he just seem… you know,” Agnes said, shuddering. “Urgh.. he just kind of revolts me. Like, what is he doing in there?”
“In where?” Ethel, Claire and Tina all asked.
“In his office,” Agne said. “With the lights off, and the doors bolted, and all the windows covered in soot. It’s not… it’s not natural.”
“Natural?” Ethel, Tina and Claire all asked.
“You know, the sort of thing a human being of living flesh might do,” Agnes said, suddenly leaving the room so she could go and make a cup of tea even though she’d only just had a cup of tea. “There’s something very wrong about the mayor, that’s all I know. Something very wrong indeed.”
“Well, that was weird,” Tina and Ethel said.
“But not rude,” Claire said. “At all. Stupid Mum. Who cares about the mayor anyway?””
“The mayor,” Daniel said, taking his earphones off now it was safe, and looking at the others very seriously indeed through the holes in the crocheted blanket. “Is a massive fucking wanker.”
“Daniel!” Tina, Ethel and most definitely Claire all shouted. “You can’t say that!”
“Well, it’s only what I heard,” Daniel said, before putting his earphones back on and listening to whatever it was he was listening to under his blanket while he watched whatever it was he was watching in there with the cat and the doll (he’d finished his yoghurt by now).
Tales From The Town #135: Live From The Mayor’s Office
“They think I’m some kind of vampire,” the mayor cackled gleefully in the dark. “But I’m not a vampire at all. I’m a ghoul.”
(to be published between September 30th and November 11th, 2023)
Tales From The Town #129: And the apples are all dead at the bottom of their trees
Apples rotting beneath the trees. Teardrop jewelled spider’s webs on the washing line. And in the distance ships lost in the fog out at sea.
Autumn was here, and not even Claire declaring that there’s no such thing as ghost ships could spoil Agnes’s mood.
Tales From The Town #130: The Rudest Word In The Entire World (Part 1)
“This game is rubbish!” Claire said, kicking the board up in the air and scattering toy cars everywhere. “It’s complete CRAP!”
“Claire!” Tina and Ethel exclaimed. “You can’t say that!”
“I can!” Claire said. “And I did!”
“But it’s…. it’s rude!”
“Really rude!”
“I don’t care!” Claire said. “And you shouldn’t either!”
“But we do!”
“What if Daniel hears!”
“You know how upset he gets about rude words!”
“And rude people!”
“And rudeness in general.”
“Well, maybe Daniel should just shut up!” Claire said.
Daniel came running into the room, arms outstretched, pretending to be an aeroplane. Then he flew back out of the room and up the stairs to play with the dolls, who didn’t swear at all, not even when talking about the witch.
Tales From The Town #131: Descriptions Of The Witch
The witch was
the witch
was
the witch
was the witch
Tales From The Town #132: The Rudest Word In The Entire World (Part 2)
“Mum! Claire keeps saying rude words!” Ethel said.
“I don’t!” Claire said.
“You do!” Tina said.
“Well, yes, I do! But I don’t care!” Claire said. “All I said was that Tina’s stupid car game was a load of old crap.”
“Claire you shouldn’t say things like that,” Agnes said. “You know Tina likes that car game.”
“Actually, it is kind of rubbish,” Tina said.
“We don’t even know what we’re doing most of the time,” Ethel said.
“Oh,” Agnes said. “So why are you upset with Claire then.”
“Cause she said…” Tina said. “She said that rude word Mum!”
“Daniel might have heard!” Ethel said.
“I was an aeroplane,” Daniel said. “And then I was the dolls’ best friend.” He looked at the cat to make sure she wasn’t jealous. “And then I was a spaceship.”
“See?” Claire said. “Spaceship’s don’t get upset by rude words.”
“Not even intelligent spaceships,” Daniel said, nodding sagely.
“Well, I’m glad this has all been sorted out,” Agnes said. “Also I didn’t even realise crap was a rude word.”
“Mum!” Tina and Ethel gasped, utterly shocked, as Daniel ran from the room screaming.
Tales From The Town #133: Eleonora’s Office Lunch
Bread (that was once fresh)
Spread (that contains the memory of butter and/or olive oil)
Apple (taken from beneath someone else’s tree)
Prepare before work
then at lunch eat as quickly as you can.
Try not to think
about anything at all
Tales From The Town #134: The Rudest Word In The Entire World (Part 3)
“So what is a rude word then, Mum?” Ethel asked.
“Yeah, Mum, I bet you know loads of rude words,” Claire said. “Like, you must know words so rude Daniel wouldn’t even know they were rude.”
“I’d know,” Daniel said, hugging the cat and one of the dolls while watching his favourite tv programme on his phone and eating a yoghurt all at once while also hiding in a den he’d made using a crocheted blanket stretched out between three chairs and kept in place by some precarious towers of heavy looking books.
“Well, maybe you just need to shut up, Daniel,” Claire said. “Maybe you should all shut up and let Mum say what she wants.”
“That doesn’t make any sense, Claire,” Tina said.
“I don’t care,” Claire said. “Anyway, look, Daniel’s put his headphones on. You can say anything now Mum!”
“Just so we know never to say whatever it is!” Ethel added, actually quite eager to hear something so forbidden.
“Or accidentally put it in a poem,” Tina said.
“Or a story.”
“Or the script we’re writing for a radio show that we’re going to broadcast to the whole town!”
“You’re not going to catch me out that easily,” Agnes said. “And anyway, it’s not the word that matters, it’s the intent.”
“That sounds stupid,” Claire said. “Of course it’s the word that matters, Mum. Otherwise it’d just be… noise!”
“I simply mean…” Agnes said, feeling quite defensive. She hated being put on the spot like this. “Like, what about the mayor?”
“What about the mayor?” Tina, Ethel and Claire all asked.
“I mean, the mayor,” Agnes said, looking out of the window as if maybe she could see the mayor out of the window even though the mayor was shut up in the mayor’s office like always and not in their garden like he never was and never had been nor ever would be. “There’s nothing wrong with the word. But what about the man?”
“What about the man?” Tina, Claire and Ethel all asked.
“Doesn’t he just seem… you know,” Agnes said, shuddering. “Urgh.. he just kind of revolts me. Like, what is he doing in there?”
“In where?” Ethel, Claire and Tina all asked.
“In his office,” Agne said. “With the lights off, and the doors bolted, and all the windows covered in soot. It’s not… it’s not natural.”
“Natural?” Ethel, Tina and Claire all asked.
“You know, the sort of thing a human being of living flesh might do,” Agnes said, suddenly leaving the room so she could go and make a cup of tea even though she’d only just had a cup of tea. “There’s something very wrong about the mayor, that’s all I know. Something very wrong indeed.”
“Well, that was weird,” Tina and Ethel said.
“But not rude,” Claire said. “At all. Stupid Mum. Who cares about the mayor anyway?””
“The mayor,” Daniel said, taking his earphones off now it was safe, and looking at the others very seriously indeed through the holes in the crocheted blanket. “Is a massive fucking wanker.”
“Daniel!” Tina, Ethel and most definitely Claire all shouted. “You can’t say that!”
“Well, it’s only what I heard,” Daniel said, before putting his earphones back on and listening to whatever it was he was listening to under his blanket while he watched whatever it was he was watching in there with the cat and the doll (he’d finished his yoghurt by now).
Tales From The Town #135: Live From The Mayor’s Office
“They think I’m some kind of vampire,” the mayor cackled gleefully in the dark. “But I’m not a vampire at all. I’m a ghoul.”
Re: A Cast Of Characters
These preview tales are good preview tales. Good, I tells yer!
And yonder mayor interests me strangely.
And yonder mayor interests me strangely.
Re: A Cast Of Characters
thank ye homfrus
Re: A Cast Of Characters
Some miniature tales, in six different flavours
https://accumulationofthings.com/things ... ons-16-21/
https://accumulationofthings.com/things ... ons-16-21/
Re: A Cast Of Characters
hooray, lovely
so many jellyfish
so many jellyfish
Re: A Cast Of Characters
i love jellyfish and i always will
Re: A Cast Of Characters
Good stuff, Davuss!
Ma particular faves are: Pocket Tales #18: Tales From The Fields & Pocket Tales #19: Tales From The Woods
This:
"In the long grass
the cat
dreams it was a lion"
Along with that drawing = YUSS!
Ma particular faves are: Pocket Tales #18: Tales From The Fields & Pocket Tales #19: Tales From The Woods
This:
"In the long grass
the cat
dreams it was a lion"
Along with that drawing = YUSS!
Re: A Cast Of Characters
excellent, thank you
Re: A Cast Of Characters
they are lovely
Re: A Cast Of Characters
YOU are lovely
Re: A Cast Of Characters
These TFTT scenes are lovely, and I heartily approve of them!
Re: A Cast Of Characters
A little nugget of pleasingness! Approves!
Re: A Cast Of Characters
Tale #139: Cold Conversation
https://accumulationofthings.com/things ... versation/
“Winter’s rubbish,” Claire said. “I mean, look!” She stamped her boots down in the muddy puddle under the swing, which was frozen so completely she didn’t splash anyone with mud even slightly. “See? Awful!”
“I thought you liked the cold?” Tina said. “You’ve been wanting it to snow all week.”
“Only so we wouldn’t have to school,” Claire said. “Cold without snow’s totally pointless.”
“You’re’re’re to-to-totally pointlessssssssssss,” Ethel said, her teeth chattering so hard her insult didn’t upset Claire at all.
“Wntrsthbst,” Daniel said from beneath two scarfs, three hats, and a hood, “Nwntrycnsallthstrsnthsk!”
“Shut up about stars, Daniel,” Claire said. “It’s not even night time.”
“You’re’re’re’re’re no-no-no-no-not even night-ti-ti-ti-ti-time,” Ethel said, over the course of several minutes, by which time the sun had set and also it had started to snow.
“Snow’s rubbish,” Claire said. “What’s the point of snow on a Saturday?”
https://accumulationofthings.com/things ... versation/
“Winter’s rubbish,” Claire said. “I mean, look!” She stamped her boots down in the muddy puddle under the swing, which was frozen so completely she didn’t splash anyone with mud even slightly. “See? Awful!”
“I thought you liked the cold?” Tina said. “You’ve been wanting it to snow all week.”
“Only so we wouldn’t have to school,” Claire said. “Cold without snow’s totally pointless.”
“You’re’re’re to-to-totally pointlessssssssssss,” Ethel said, her teeth chattering so hard her insult didn’t upset Claire at all.
“Wntrsthbst,” Daniel said from beneath two scarfs, three hats, and a hood, “Nwntrycnsallthstrsnthsk!”
“Shut up about stars, Daniel,” Claire said. “It’s not even night time.”
“You’re’re’re’re’re no-no-no-no-not even night-ti-ti-ti-ti-time,” Ethel said, over the course of several minutes, by which time the sun had set and also it had started to snow.
“Snow’s rubbish,” Claire said. “What’s the point of snow on a Saturday?”
Re: A Cast Of Characters
A lovely scene! Hurrah!